One of the things that surprises many people when I speak to them are the things that do NOT have to be done. I have shared through this column many things that have to be done so I am switching gears this week and sharing what does not need to be done instead:

1. Embalming – Perhaps one of the most common misunderstandings is that embalming is automatically done when a funeral home is called. The truth is embalming cannot be done without your specific permission and there are funeral options where embalming is not required. The general rule is that when a public viewing is held, then embalming is done.
2. Vaults – When it comes time to bury a casket or an urn in a cemetery, the vault is the large container that the casket or urn are placed into. Vaults are not required by law but are a requirement of many cemeteries. But if the cemetery does not require one, you can bury the urn or the casket directly into the ground.
3. Caskets/Urns – While I and my funeral home are equipped to present and educate you on the many styles of caskets and urns, the truth is you do not need to buy one from a me or any other funeral home. You can make or buy one elsewhere if you so choose. Though I have seen many a woodworker make their own urn, I do not normally see homemade caskets. I do know, however, that there are craftsman out there who could make their own casket and do an excellent job of it.
4. Lyrics – As you may have noticed, I did not start my column this week with song lyrics. Just one of the many other things that do not need to be done that may surprise you!

What does have to be done when you have questions and need guidance before or after a death? You need a trusted friend and professional to help you through it. That way you can get back to the living, laughing and loving you deserve and need.